A New Idea

It's been a week and we still haven't talked. I truly don't understand why he's acting like this, was what I did really that bad?

On the other hand my girlfriend was great. we were spending a lot more time together then we usually were. But then one afternoon the big bomb exploded right in my face, She was moving. I knew I should be devastated but I couldn't help myself but to feel really happy. She was leaving and it would give me a better chance to fight for Clayton. I knew Clayton and her still had feelings for each other but I was the one that was stopping them. They had kissed too, or so they tell me, before I moved here. I didn't mind knowing this because I really just wanted her and not him; or so I thought, but it was actually the other way around.

But then a week later she left; she left me with this one note telling me how much she loves me. I am not sure what love is but if she thinks she loves me then I love Clayton. Was love the fluff and feeling of being full of something that over powered any other emotion or what was she talking about. Love?

A Surprising Thought

Morning came and before I could finish my cereal, Clayton had already come to tell me to go to his house to play. I was ready for the usual games; pretend we have super powers and hot sexy girlfriends. After we play He would eat at my house or me at his, he wasn't just my only friend he was like a brother I never had.

I quickly gulped the last bit of cereal and milk and went to shower and change. As I waited for my sister to get out of the shower I looked into my closet to see what I might wear to Clayton's house today. My mom didn't like me using my newest cloths because they would end up smelling like smoke. His mother is such a nice lady, but boy did she smoke. I didn't mind the smell at least not much anymore after a year with it you get used to it.

My sister got out and I rushed to get a quick shower because I felt like something was going to happen, but I  sure didn't want to be dirty if what I'm thinking might happen happens. I walked to my room and I was finally  going to chose between two outfits I could wear but before I could finish choosing...

My Little Guy: His Motivating Thoughts

I waited out side his house, like a little kid awaiting a big surprise that would never come. A simple kiss was what my first dream was about between me and Clayton. Clayton was just perfect a little country, manly, and had the most adorable stutter.

Finally Clayton arrived at the door and I could feel my little guy trying to make an appearance. This almost never happened, but oh did my guy want to be seen today. I noted to myself not to think about the dream nor what I want to happen nor what sorta happened 3 months ago.

First Thoughts and Reactions

This is dedicated to the mutepoet.blogspot.com, thanks to her I will start making this little series about my memories with some fiction added in too.

As I walked down the hall from my room to the front door I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened yesterday; I had kissed a girl. The action felt so natural but yet I don't know why I still feel like I want to kiss, our guy friend, Clayton. This thought had made its way into my mind because of an image I can't get out of my head, the image had so much love, no care in the world, and I guess I just want to feel like that for a little bit of my 8-year old life.

As I walked out I walked down the stairs and crossed the road to Clayton's house. I was so used to going here it felt like my second home, but I had to remind myself that we are just friends, even though I wanted more...*

*these thoughts never truly happened but looking back I unconsciously did want it to happen.